Being A Dad


 ‘Being A Dad’
‘For whom all fatherhood in heaven and in earth is named’ Ephesians 3:15

Fathers’ Day is definitely on my calendar.
I make it easy for my family. I tell them weeks in advance what I would like, for Fathers’ Day, for my birthday, and for Christmas. I cannot abide the gift I don’t want, having to smile unconvincingly, and return it to the shop.
A waste of money, and a sign of poor communication I think.
Instead, usually I buy the thing myself, and have it delivered to the house.
Poor form? I think not. It works for me.

Yes, perhaps Fathers’ Day it’s a marketing ploy, a fiction of the greeting card companies, and a time to scratch your head wondering what to buy for that male someone who has everything. 
It doesn’t appear in the church’s year, unlike Mothering Sunday… something the liturgical revisionists seem to have overlooked. Why not a Grandparents’ Day, a Children’s Day, an 
Uncles’ Day?

Whether you enjoy it, or avoid it, it is a time to reflect on the role men have in family life, in our own lives, and in the life of the Church.

It’s sometimes said that women run the church and families. But look around at the quiet influence for good of dads, sons, grandfathers, uncles, brothers; men who are Sunday School teachers, youth leaders, grass cutters, Church Wardens, prayer warriors, community leaders.

Fathers’ Day is a day to celebrate, to say Thank You. And also to remember.
For many it’s a difficult day, a time to see again the empty place at the family dinner table. And for some a time to sorrow in what never was.

Whether it’s a life stage I’m in, I’ve been thinking recently about my Grandfathers who are no longer here. It was a chance remark from a loved family member, saying how proud my grandfather would be of my own sons.  Or perhaps being given items which my own grandparents treasured, and seeing their handwriting inside.
Or thinking about the great spiritual legacy of a grandfather and his books which I still read and gain from today.

Whether the church intended it or not, at St John’s and Kiltermon we always mark the day. Not flower posies or cards, maybe just a wrapped chocolate mint at the door of the church, but more importantly , a reminder in our worship, of the words from St Paul, who told the church that from God the Father,  ‘all fatherhood in heaven and in earth is named.’

Sometimes you sadly overhear the remark, that someone doesn’t deserve to be a father. But only when I became a father, and read this scripture did I appreciate the privilege it is to be a father to two great sons, and that all fatherhood and family life has it origin in God, our Father.

It makes me want to pull up my socks, and be the best dad I can be.

Once upon a time I could easily bundle them up into my arms and bring them where I wanted to go. That often ended up feeding ducks, or running to music lessons, or school runs, or holding the end of a piece of wood as someone learned to use a saw.


Today, as two fine men have emerged, being their dad is different. It's less bundling and more listening. The balance is changing and more and more I follow on in their plans. It’s something I am growing into with them, as I listen, and admire who they are today.
Whether I’ve done it well, or made mistakes,  I am heartened and encouraged that something of the Fatherhood of God, is reflected in the great job of being a dad, a son, a brother, an uncle.

God knew what we would need for the ups and downs of family life. He knew there would be celebrations, and sorrows, moments with a lump in the throat, and days for laughter.  From that moment when I listened for their first breath, until the day when they listen for my last, God our heavenly Father promises to journey with us in this great time we have together, called life.

On this day we thank God for wives and children, for families. But we especially thank him for the men who allow our lives to be what they are. To Dads.
This year’s gift was delivered weeks ago, and its contents are now planted in the garden, making the best of the early summer sunshine and rain. 
God bless you in these days as you journey on with God, our heavenly Father. Amen.

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